Time, anxiety, and doing a lot

Yes, yes, we know. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step. But that doesn’t make it any easier being 200 steps in, and not sure if the road goes where you think it goes, or even if that’s where you should be going. It can be confusing, discouraging, and downright awful sometimes. It’s a short trip to feeling pretty bad about yourself, to feeling like a loser, to feeling like everyone else has it together but you. To imposter syndrome. To anxiety and paralysis.

It’s all too easy to stare yourself down and see what you haven’t figure out yet, what you haven’t accomplished, and what you think everyone else is doing. To look at facebook feeds and think you’ve wasted your time on nothing while everyone else has perfect lunches, perfect children, and witty remarks.

So here’s my challenge: pick a day. Your birthday’s a good one, or new years, or hell, why not halloween? It doesn’t matter. The point is to pick a date to come back to every year. Take out a piece of paper or a journal (I guess you could do this on your computer, but it’s less fun that way. You can’t use an awesome pen and draw cool doodles as easily).

Think back on the last year. What did you do? Sometimes I have to cheat and get out my calendar, but that’s cool. I think you might be amazed what you’ve done in a year. Travel? Host parties? Go to a shitload of yoga classes? Complete a year of school? Pass an important exam? Celebrate an anniversary? Lose someone? Start learning a new skill? Get published? Start a blog? Get a new job? Dye your hair? Run a race? Ok, those are on my this-year-list, and yours will be different. But when I write it all out like that, I look, and I say damn, I did more than I thought.

And you know what? I rock. So do you.

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